B.D.K. Chapter 1

Kelly's highlights were brightest where they framed her strikingly beautiful features. She had high, wide cheekbones that dipped into concave cheeks, dimpled slightly with her infectious grin, a strong jaw and deep green eyes. It's hard to convey in words the precise magic of her face, but locking eyes with her was intensely intoxicating. I would frequently find myself captured in her gaze, enchanted for a brief moment by some tension I couldn't identify, before she would break it with a goofy grin and a joke.

The night things changed started at an otherwise unremarkable college party. There was music and dancing, obviously drinking. Small clumps of kids in various raucous conversations and people getting friendly on couches. We had arrived together but spent most of our time there apart on an unspoken understanding. We mingled and danced, meeting eyes across rooms and over the shoulders of the people we were taking to. We would exchange a wink or a knowing smile, and occasionally came together to laugh conspiringly about something ridiculous we'd heard, or to rate fellow partiers who'd been hitting on us.

Eventually we found our selves on the couch together, the party winding down around us. We were sitting close, her warm thigh pressed against mine and the skin of her arm brushing against me as we laughed about something. She caught me in her eyes as the laugher slowly faded between us, and I remember once again feeling a hint of strange energy, though I could not place it.

"Do you want to get out of here?" She asked suddenly, patting my thigh.

"Sure," I said, grinning, "your place? Watch a movie or something?"

She agreed and we were up and out; stumbling, laughing. kicking at nothings. It was a short trip, and we were walking through her door in minutes. At some point during the walk we had stumbled upon the topic of gender roles and identity.

"I think some guys just feel the need to be macho all the time because they don't really know themselves, you know?" Kelly was saying, "It's like, they have no real, strong personality so they co-opt this shallow image of masculinity and try to make it real for themselves, cause they don't have anything else."